When we are children, we frequently accept our family at face value. We don’t question why things are done the way they are until we have another household to compare it to. This revelation begins our awakening journey in regards to our clan. Why do the people in our home do holidays this way and my friend’s folks do it another? Let’s look at how we react to the unfolding of our home tribe.
Most children go through a “Why” stage in their development. They question everything. It can seem like they aren’t looking for real answers with their incessant queries. It feels like they just want your attention. My dad was in the Army until I was seventeen yrs old. Dad occasionally worked at a 2nd job, like delivering papers or mowing someone’s grass for pay. Before I started school, I thought everybody’s dad was in the Army. We went to stores and other businesses where I saw adults out of uniform. My child-mind deduced that this was a side-job if I saw a man working out of uniform, but it might be the regular job if it was a woman working behind a counter. When I saw a woman in uniform, then I had to adjust my thinking again. When I began school, I had an awakening where I found out not everyone’s dad was in the military. They didn’t move every 18 months either. I also discovered that some mothers worked outside the home while my mother did not.
A story is told about a young girl asking her mother why she cut off a small portion of a large ham and threw it away before cooking the remaining amount in the oven for Christmas dinner. The mom replied it was what her mother always did because that was the way it was supposed to be cooked. The girl asked the grandmother the same question, and she replied that her mother, the child’s great-grandmother, showed her how to cook a ham. This was just how it was done in their family. The great-grandmother was questioned. She thinks back on her days of cooking ham. She tells her great-granddaughter that she had to cut off the small portion of ham because she did not have a pan big enough to cook the entire thing. She never threw the small piece away. She merely put it in the freezer for later. Asking why can lead to thought-provoking revelations.
After I became an adult and had children of my own, I discovered more about my family. There was much that was never discussed when my siblings and I were living at home. Some of it was pretty shocking, while other information was mild in comparison. After these family disclosures, I saw my parents in a new light. They were human beings doing the best they knew how given the circumstances they encountered. In my early adulthood, I swore I would be different than my parents and rebelled against their advice on some things. When I found out why they behaved the way they did when we were children, I was humbled and proud that they found a way to get things done to take care of us all. Let me share some examples.
Military pay in the 1960s did not go far. My mom sold her diamond wedding rings for $25 to make a down payment on a mobile home for us to live in. My dad worked extra jobs so we could have food, clothing, and pay utilities, but it often left him out of our lives when we were growing up. My siblings and I rarely spent the night with relatives because our parents were sexually abused by members of their extended family. They were protecting us, but we saw it as isolation.
Do you know the history of your family- however that family was made up for you? Have you wondered why your home-life was different from other people you knew? Awakening regarding the true nature of your own clan and dealing with those findings is a good start in learning hard truths about the world around us. We need to clean up our own family skeletons and dust under the bed to clear the cobwebs. It will help us cope with more profound revelations that may be more difficult to digest.
Our Awakening Journey will become progressively deeper as we go. Some items I will be giving you information about may seem too fantastic to be accurate. There will be some things you may already be aware of. To the best of my ability, I will provide sources and examples as we go along. This series will start with simpler subjects to comprehend, but there will be meatier topics as well. Buckle your seat-belts, folks. We are entering wonderland.
*Photo is my family circa 1969
~ Stay-Tuned! Wednesday is a Big Announcement! I am bursting to tell you now…somehow I will hold it in.